Lord, Make Me Smarter

Watching my kids excel and thrive fills me with so much joy. Especially when they exceed what I could even imagine as possible. Of course, we know that even the impossible is still possible with God. We have watched miracle after miracle take place in the lives of our children, and that continues even now.

As a homeschooling parent, I get to see where my kids are thriving and struggling on a regular basis. I can help them find new ways to figure things out and encourage them to work outside the box to find solutions. That doesn’t mean I know how their knowledge and skill lines up with their peers in public education, though. That is where the required annual testing comes in. Annika completed hers a couple weeks back and blew me away with how advanced she was in certain areas. I knew Elijah would take longer to test with his different needs. He struggled greatly at first. The test anxiety was brutal. It took more than a little reassurance that the test is simply a tool to show me what he needs to learn, not something intended to give him a bad grade. It wasn’t until the third day of testing that he relaxed and even became excited about it. The results spoke for themselves. For the first time ever, he not only scored at grade level in a majority of subjects, he scored above in some areas. It blew me away!

Happy boy!

Annika has been continuing on, doing so well in her studies. She has also been having a blast with Daniel. They have such a special bond. She will roughhouse with him, tickle him, cuddle with him in bed, and run around with him on her back. That is really saying something, since he is huge! We have also been continuing our movie nights. This last weekend I convinced her we needed to watch Singin’ in the Rain. She was not so sure at first, but I knew she would love it. She appreciates the classics almost as much as I did at that age. I will often hear her cracking up after turning on I Love Lucy, so I knew Donald O’Connor would definitely be appreciated. I was not wrong. We laughed and enjoyed the amazing talents of that fantastic trio.

My babies

The last couple of weeks have been a tad overwhelming. Not only had we been doing testing, but I had also been trying to connect with the nurse coordinating the upcoming procedure Daniel will be having. I had received a notice that insurance had denied the procedure, and I still had not been told what time we were supposed to get Daniel to the hospital. Yesterday the nurse returned my call. The doctor had been on vacation when the denial was sent, so now they are in the process of coordinating with the insurance. Thankfully, she assured me there will be no issue and it should be approved and resolved by the beginning of next week. She will also have a firm time to give me once that approval comes back. So reassuring to have that sorted out.

As the week is coming towards a close, I have been looking back at just how amazingly good God is, and how He continues to pave the way. But it is always in His time. His timing is perfect, and we are wise to wait upon Him and His perfect will. To not jump out on our own ideas. I had been discussing this very thing with Daniel’s therapist earlier. My brain told me that I should have quickly jumped to get the blood work done when the original genetic tests were ordered. But something in me stilled my actions. That was right when Covid had first broken out. We would have potentially been exposing all three of us to Covid. We would have struggled with the masking issue, as Daniel cannot and will not wear one. It would have been a difficult experience for him struggling against a mask and having his blood drawn. To make matters even more intense, insurance ended up refusing to cover those lab tests. So, we waited on God. Last week the kit from a different lab came in the mail, and we were able to collect saliva instead of blood in the comfort of our own home, and insurance is covering it so we will not have to pay anything out of pocket.

Every day as a wife, a parent, and even just as a daughter of the King, I find I need wisdom. Going through this life is hard. There are new challenges every day, new choices that sometimes carry serious consequences with them. I need God-given wisdom to make those right choices. Thankfully, James 1:5 assures us that if we lack wisdom, all we have to do is ask God and He will give it generously. God giving wisdom was not limited to Solomon, though we know how greatly God blessed him because of that very request. I remember hearing Beth Moore say in a Bible Study once that she prays, “God, make me smarter than I am!” I think that sums it up nicely.

Proverbs 9:10NKJV

So, what is wisdom? Merriam-Webster defines wisdom as “ability to discern inner qualities and relationships, good sense, generally accepted belief, accumulated philosophical or scientific learning, a wise attitude, belief, or course of action, and the teachings of the ancient wise men.” That is what most people will agree on. But I am more interested in what God tells us about wisdom. So, what does the Bible tell us wisdom is? I especially like what Proverbs 9:10 NASB1995 says. “The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.” That fear of the Lord isn’t the negative be scared and horrified type of fear. It is that positive, be in awe and amazed and terrified in the best way of just how holy and magnificent He is. No sin can stay in His presence, it would burn right up in the fire of His glory. It is that fear that causes us to turn away from evil, refusing to be wise in our own eyes. (Proverbs 3:7) Job 28:28 ESV says And he said to man, ‘Behold, the fear of the Lord, that is wisdom, and to turn away from evil is understanding.’” Matthew 7:24 ESV Jesus makes this statement, “Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock.” I don’t know about you, but I definitely don’t want to lean on my own understanding and be swept away by the chaos of life.

What does that wisdom look like? James 3:17 ESV tells us “But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere.” Ephesians 5:15-17 ESV says “Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.” Wisdom is pure and gentle, follows after God and His will. People living in wisdom are sincere, ready to listen and willing to learn. They are willing to grow and recognize nobody has all the answers. There is humility and kindness in wisdom. The Bible also describes wisdom as being far more precious than gold or rubies.

The Bible is filled with stories of God giving people wisdom. I love the beauty of that very wisdom being carried out when those people recognize that very wisdom is from God. I love the words of Daniel after God gave them the discernment to interpret the king’s dreams, thus saving their lives. “To you, O God of my fathers, I give thanks and praise, for you have given me wisdom and might, and have now made known to me what we asked of you, for you have made known to us the king’s matter.”Daniel 2:23ESV

If you are like me, constantly facing decision after decision knowing that you need wisdom, that’s okay! Remember, you can ask. You can wait before the Lord, delight in Him and His will, and He will pour out His wisdom over you. He loves you so much! I pray that as you go in to the weekend, you are filled with the Hope, Joy, and Wisdom that comes from God. As always, feel free to like, comment or share.